I don’t know if it’s the cheesy gladiator names or the overly pumped and enthusiastic competitors that I like the most - but the new American Gladiators has managed to capture the spirit of the old in a way that I was worried that they wouldn’t.

No longer do we have Zap and Laser or Turbo - no, now we have Wolf and Toa and Justice. I love that each gladiator is like a character, from Wolf howling at every chance he gets to Toa walking and moving like he we just pulled him out of the jungle - it cracks me up.

And then you have the competitors who seem to be the most positive and enthusiastic people in the world, even as they’re being mashed and beat up and tossed around by the giant gladiators. As much as I would love to compete on the show I’m sure that at some point Hulk Hogan would come up to interview me saying something like “Well dude, it looked like you were going to get some points there until Militia threw you across the ring like used banana peel” and I would probably start cussing about his mother and how I’m probably just going to kick him in the nuts next time I saw him.

Well, maybe people will get tired of listening to these happy people and want to see somebody get their ass kicked and get angry about it. Maybe.

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